Most parents say they would DIE for their children, but less than 30% will LIVE healthy for them.

Stay ready

*Thanksgiving at my mother-in-law's*

Me to Kim: (pats her belly) now remember sweetie, you're eating for two.

Mother-in-law: you mean....

Me: That's right, Kim has a tapeworm.

Maybe the people that don't get it aren't supposed to.